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Friday, 02 March 2007



Great introspective recap, but I'm glad you provided a link for relative newcomers to enjoy the adventure in its original format.

It's good to know that a man's reaction can be just as emotional the second time around. We don't enjoy the same connectedness as the mother does prior to the birth, so we're never sure how we'll feel.

Then it hits us, and soon fatherhood feels as natural as breathing.

Moksha Gren

Moonshot and I often talk about the future Baby #2 and look forward to someday being able to go through the experience again with some foreknowledge of what it will be like. The first time was amazing, but so surreal that I can only remember it as a hazy blur from which crystaline images sparkle. Maybe with Baby #2, I think, I'll be able to calmly appriciate the moment.

But probably not. And certainly not in your case.

Last night Moonshot, Norah and I treked down to the hospital three blocks from our house to meet the newborn daughter of some close friends of ours. It was odd to be there, to see the same haggard but excited look on Dan's face that I know I wore only seven short months ago. It was bizzar to hold that tiny bundle that weighed so little I was afriad she would float away and to remember that Norah herself was nearly that small so recently.

I may have to go back and recalulate my "perception of time" chart to factor in children...little time warps in diapers, I say.


You are an amazing writer. You salmost made me feel as though I was there . Good job. and you seem like an awesome man and Dad. Oh just so you know I got yourlinc through JuJu. I read your comments all the time. They're great. I'll be back.


Mark, the emotion was all there the second time around, to be sure. I knew what was coming (other than the location, that is) so I had more a sense of anticipation than the first time, so it was all of a different flavour, but no less sweet for all of that.

Moksha, I've done that same thing - holding a newborn and reeling back, wondering how my own kid was ever so small and seemingly frail. Very true about the perception of time. I don't know where the last nearly three years have gone, they've been so fast, but they've also been so full that I can't recollect much of the time before. I think you'll need quantum mechanics to adjust your graphs accurately! (Or just get Norah to scrawl something on a piece of paper and then try to rationalise it. That'd be more fun.)

Lori, thanks very much. I try to be a good husband and dad, with varying degrees of success at times. It's all fun.


Happy birthday, Tavish!


I was going to say, "happy birthday, Tavish," but Paula beat me to it. So I'll just say, "happy birthday, Tavish," instead.


Like you, Dad, I can hardly believe it's been an entire year. It seems like a few months ago that I was tearing up here to the computer, hourly, awaiting updates on the arrival. I was like a proud and nervous aunt. It was one of those days/nights that I regretted how often I'd declared my utter hatred for computers.
Have I ever told you how much I appreciate and love you for opening up your life and letting us intrude day after day after day? I'm real sure I'm not alone in this.
Please give that gorgeous boy (the smaller of the two) a great big birthday hug from me. Oh, give Declan one too. And have fun! I don't have to remind you to take pictures or video.

Émilie B.

That Tavish's birth post a year ago was great, and I think everyone who read it must remember most of the story, down to some funny details.

I am too looking forward to the differences between a first and second birth when it happens (hopefully a short and easy labour... heh), but I think, in a way, the fathers have the chance to live their emotions a little better at the actual birth - we're too busy with labour and then sheer exhaustion. I was happy when Xavier came out, but I have to admit a good part of that was just being happy that he WAS out.

We do feel a connection prior to birth, Mark, but oddly, it might be a bit overrated. The baby still is very much a stranger to us at first, as if we lost the living thing that was inside us, and gained another new one, with a very different interaction, instead. That's how it was for me anyway. Xavier was born around 9pm, but it was the next morning, when all the grandparents were gone and we were alone with him, that I really met my son.

And they change so fast at their age, at some odd fleeting moments I notice his last growth spurs all at once and it hits me to the heart. I feel I'm still meeting a small stranger, except that my love is already multiplied by months.


Well said, Emilie B. Sorry, no time to get your accent on the first E.

I know I speak for men everywhere myself when I say I'm perfectly happy letting the woman experience the first nine months for me.


Simon, the post you wrote about Tavish's birth was the first of your posts I'd ever read - and man, was I hooked. I'd never read abything so personal, so emotional, so poignant, and so damn funny before.

Happy birthday to Tavish, and congratulations to you and Amy for raising two little boys who seem to grow smarter and more adorable every day.

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