Let them eat cake

The Canadian Blood Services is missing out on an untapped demographic (literally) by not pimping themselves to the high school and university geek-gaming crowd.  I realised this earlier in the week while sitting in the comfy donor's chair for my 57th blood-letting, and later, when I had my free soup and cookies while reading a pamphlet that revealed, from a poll, that Canadians assume about 24% of the population are blood donors, when the real number is only 3.7%.  Three point seven percent.

I tie this to the blood that's wastefully roiling about the circulatory systems of countless thousands of gaming geeks across the country because it was only a couple of weeks ago I got my silver donor card in the mail to replace my old bronze one.  50 donations versus 25.  That's when it hit me: I just levelled up.  Hell, 43 more times and I'll get my gold card for 100, baby!

I first donated when a clinic came to my high school.  Anyone over 17 years and 100 pounds was eligible.  The sex questions posed by the nurses were, then, both a lot more embarrassing and a lot less applicable.  The one largely because of the other.  I got a little plastic lapel pin and, weeks later, my donor card in the mail, plain white.  Type O, RH positive.

As a donor of whole blood I could only give every eight weeks because red blood cells need to be regenerated via bone marrow, and I settled into a consistent routine.  I petered out for a few years in university but have surged again since getting married.  Last year, instead of whole blood, I tried donating platelets - the bit that makes scabs - which is a two-hour process because all the non-platelets get separated and re-injected back into you.  But you get a quilt to keep you warm (the returned blood has cooled) and your very own DVD player to watch a movie.  Since all but the platelets are returned, you can donate every two weeks.  This venture was short-lived because my veins, by dint of the needle spending so much time in my arm and my biological aversion to sharp pokey things, complained on two occasions by bleeding internally.

A golf ball-sized hematoma at the injection site is nothing more than uncomfortable and mildly gross, even though it looks nasty.  And after a couple days it makes for a wicked bruise that covers a surprising amount of your arm.  That's neat, but not neat enough to do to myself every two weeks.  So I started giving plasma.

Plasma can be donated every week since, as with platelets, all the red blood cells are returned.  And because it lasts less than an hour, my veins are happy.  And I get to flirt with the nurses more frequently.

There's a sticker on the back of donor cards that lists the number of previous donations with room underneath to mark the date of the 10 most recent.  When those ten are filled up: new sticker, new total.  That's when I realised that giving blood is like gaming in real life.

Part of the appeal of geek gaming (Dungeons & Dragons, role playing video games) is the immersion in some other realm.  Playing make believe.  The other part of the appeal that doesn't get as much lip service is character advancement.  That final member of the rabid herd of three-legged albino unicorns is finally slain, the experience points divvied up, and your quondam hanger-on of a party mage, having bided her time, has now been imbued with the ability to cast Fireball!  Who's laughing now??

Apply that same thinking to giving blood, and for some, a satisfying sense of altruism looks a little sweeter when you know you have to earn a gold card.  I seriously get a little tingle when I see the nurse write down the date of my donation every week or two.  It's like experience points.  I'm one step closer to a new sticker on the back of my card, and a smaller step closer to that gold card.  Gamers know they have to start at Level One and are wired to work for little or no reward knowing the delayed gratification that comes with levelling up.  They would make perfect blood donors.

An added incentive is knowing that they're in the top 4% of something.  That's the 96th percentile, man!  Do you know how many standard deviations away from the mean that is?  Neither do I, off hand, but that sort of thing is significant to the type of person who'll go without sleep for most of a weekend to get that +5 longsword he knows is at the end of the quest.

And the best part... seriously, the best part (other than saving lives, that is)... is that you get your very own cake on your 400th donation.  With your name on it and everything.  The way I'm going, I'm totally going to get that cake before I turn 40.  38 if I push it.  That's my goal.  You even get your name engraved on a plaque that hangs on the wall for everybody to see. There are plaques for every multiple of 100 donations.  The higher the number, the fewer the names I see when I walk past them.

That's the high score list right there! 

The parallels here are staggering, the potential unrealised.

Comments

[Linda]

Wow, you're serious aboot this. I'm impressed by your passion. And amused by your analogy.

[marian]

I have to say that I don't mind giving whole blood, but giving blood components, when they take something out, spin it around and pump parts of it back into you -- that freaks me out a bit. Something just not right about it. I'd almost rather, if they only wanted bits of things, that they threw out the rest, rather than pumping it back into me. Seems unnatural, whereas just bleeding whole blood seems like something (at least for a woman) that goes on all the time. God, all the time.

[Moksha Gren]

I'm such a wuss...and posts like this make me feel appropriately guilty for my wussdom. As a piercing enthusiast, I have no problem with needles. I don't really even have a problem with blood. However, something about blood flowing through tubes and collecting in a bag just makes me go all woozy. I gave blood once in high school with no problem, but these days when I have to give a small vial for my annual diabetes scan, I get a bit light headed. And I mean a tiny vial!

I've been working myself up to trying again. I've sat with Moonshot while she gives platelettes so I'm slowly getting myself used to the idea. Baby-steps to bleeding.

I really like your thinking on this, too. To further tap this market, I'd suggest the Blood Service work out a deal with World of Warcraft in which blood donation credits can be exchanged for cool in-game swag. WoW gets a charity push in the news, folks get better blood supplies, and gamers get not only Blood Donation Level-Ups, but functional toys to boot. Brilliant, Simon!

[Simon]

Linda, I am quite serious about how easy it is to do something to help save lives. There are a lot of people who don't qualify because of medications, health issues, pregnancy and the like. Not to mention that the probing sexual interrogation is a big turn off for some. If you can get past that, I find it becomes hard to stop.

Marian, I wish I could feel your particular pain, but of course I just can't get there. (And I'm not wishing too, too hard either :)

Moksha, I hadn't even thought of tying ACTUAL gaming swag to donating. If all some WoW gamers would have to do to earn in-game treats is roll up a sleeve every couple months, they'd be coming out in droves!

[vinny]

Good ideas! I'd love to give blood but I've spent too much time in Europe to be eligible (mad cow and all that). I know some provinces will accept me because they can now test for it but I don't think it has come to Quebec yet.

[Jenn]

I used to donate blood all the time, and then I started getting tattoo's and they didn't want my blood. Then once I passed the wait after my last tat, I got pregnant. One day, when I'm done decorating myself and having babies, I'll get back to it.

By the way, I saw you the other day at Greenwoods! I was waiting in line to see Guy Kay right behind you, but once I realized who you were and why you were so familiar to me, I was overcome with crippling shyness and had to hide among the comforting SciFi/Fantasy section.

[TerriTorial]

We used to donate all the time. Really must get back to it. Good for you!!!

Jenn, I saw a fellow blogger in my city once too and was to shy to say anything. I hate that!

[Alec]

I'm afraid I'm only a level 2 donator myself. Next time I go, I can only tell the staff: "I cast magic missile!"

I still have to laugh (with some sympathy) when I remember the first time I donated. The young lady in front of me was terrified but determined, and so proud of herself when she was finally done. Of course, she nearly fainted when she then realized the tiny test vial they'd just taken from her fingertip at the beginning was not, in fact, the entire donation...

[TerriTorial]

LOL Alec!

[Mark]

I just gave for the first time last year, and it was fulfilling. Plus, the snacks I got were sweet and the break from work was divine (our company lets the local blood donation center park its van right out front so we can give more easily.

Now I know why I've seen some folks with golf-ball size hematomas. Not because they're freaks of nature, but because they give blood. Which, according to the statistics you cite, makes them freaks of another sort.

[Tal]

Shoot, you know Simon I was feeling really proud of myself in the blood donation area - until I read your post. You KEENER! I donate blood since my time is at a premium and don't volunteer, and I can't donate as much cash as I'd like to charities that matter to me.

Blood donation is relatively fast, and free, so as far as I'm concerned there's no excuse to not do it - for me.

But platelets or plasma? Shoot, that's going the distance. All I've got is my measley 10 times pin. But, isn't every 60 days that you can donate, not 2 months?

[Simon]

Jenn, you totally should have tapped me on the shoulder or something. I only usually bite my wife.

Alec, you should also claim to attack the darkness while asking where the Mountain Dew is. That'll get 'em!

Mark, I love bein' a freak. I'm a super freak, a super freak... I'm super freaky.

Tal, for whole blood it's officially eight weeks between donations. So, 56 days. You say potato...