You ain't seen n-n-n-n-nuthin' yet

A very new and alarming - to me - development this week is that Declan has begun to stutter.

Not all the time -- he'll go for long stretches without it cropping up.  But there are others when it hurts me to watch him struggle over a single syllable 10 or 15 times before either getting it or giving up on it.

It only started this week, so it's very early yet, but I am rather anxious, having experienced it first hand.  I was a horrible stutterer through most of elementary and junior high school; it started to taper off in high school and university.  One of my final engineering courses was a credit-only (no marks) course that required a 10 minute speech on a topic of our choice.  Since I was going to be nervous anyway, I chose to talk about stuttering.  I opened up by saying that one of the few benefits of growing up with a stutter is that I only had to write a five minute speech. 

It still crops up sometimes when I'm stressed or exceedingly nervous.  The fact that I was a chubby and introverted book-worm growing up contributed to a greater than average degree of social ineptitude, which was only exacerbated by a noted reticence of speech.  And when I did bother to open my mouth, I was never sure what was going to come out anyway.  Best just to clam up then and listen.  I'm a very good listener.

When Declan verbally stumbles now, he either keeps at it until the word comes out or he just stops.  He waits a few moments and then tries to say something else.  His posture freezes like a jerky, paused VCR image as he repeats the same syllable over and over, unable to move on to the next one or, seemingly, move himself.  When he does, the freeze-frame ends and he continues his monologue.  Scary, how well I can relate to that.

One trick of stutters that Mel Blanc made famous with Porky Pig is to substitute the awkward word halfway through the stutter with a different yet related word, often to comical effect.  My absolute favourite example can be seen here.

Dex is doing the same thing, also to comical effect.  He now insists on bathing with Tavish every night when it's Baby Bath Time.  One of the first things I do is lather up a cloth and wash Tav's neck since, because he's such a puker, there are always remnants he stores under his chins.  If he goes for a couple days without a bath, he's pretty easy to smell.  Ever since I began by washing Declan the same way, since he too was a puker, I've referred to it as neck-flossing.

Now when I do it to Tav with Dex in the tub, I always say out loud that Tavish has a dirty neck.  Declan has started beating me to the punch and as soon as I reach for the baby soap he says, "Baby Tawish... dirty neck!"  I smile and laud the boy for his observational skills as I proceed to floss.

Last night in the bath, Declan sort of lost it and used the substitution trick seemingly by reflex.  As soon as I grabbed the soap: "Baby Tawish... doo - do - do - do - do - do - PENIS!"

Funny, to be sure, and I laughed when it happened.  But there's still this little ball of tiny worry that won't go away.

Comments

[Mark]

That's tough, man. Perhaps since you know the difficulties firsthand, you can help him through it whether it's temporary or not. I'm sure you would have loved having someone (especially a caring parent) who could identify with you.

Neck flossing? Nice.

That Porky Pig clip is one of my favorites, too. In fact, I rarely go a full week without thinking of that clip. Is that strange?

If the audience didn't laugh at your joke about the five-minute speech, then they were losers.

[TerriTorial]

I think you knowing about his possible stuttering early is great and with you having been through it, the help and support will provide for him will be the ultimate! You're a great Dad!

And that joke was VERY funny if you ask me. :o)

[marian]

Let me offer you some reassurance. Declan is right on schedule with the stuttering, which is really, really common in this age group. It's almost like they suddenly have so much they want to say that they get a little traffic-jam situation going, or something. I've seen it again and again. The parents always worry and it always disappears relatively soon unless the parents make a big deal out of it, in which case it can take longer.

I know you have anxieties about it and for good reason, but just keep your sense of humor, don't focus on it overly much, and treat him exactly the way you wish you'd been treated. All will be well. It's just like when he was afraid of leaves and twigs -- a phase.

[Psychfun]

Can you check your area for help with it. There are more things they will do for stuttering today especially when it is caught early.

[Moksha Gren]

It sounds like you're handling it perfectly so far. Keep an eye on it and hopefully it will fade as he grows. If not...at least you caught it early and can relate. That alone will surely help him a great deal.

Also, thanks for the "neck flossing." As the proud parent of a formula fountain I know the routine very well. Now I know what to call it.

[Linda]

"I opened up... a five minute speech." Priceless. It's unanimous.
The thing is, Simon, and I believe this and I'm not just saying it to make you feel better. That little brain is just too advanced for that little mouth to keep up. Was true in your case, no? Way more kids go through that than you realize.

[E-Belle]

Si, darlin', I'm here to second what Marian said - both as a psych major who focused on child development and pathology AND as a mother of four who saw two of her boys do the same thing at that age - and outgrow it. In fact I kinda missed it when it stopped, it was so cute. What Marian said is exactly right - their racing brains are so far ahead of their mouths, it seems they get 'stuck' on the word that they're trying to get out because they're already three or four words ahead in their minds (please tell me I spelled all those variants of 'there' correctly). Totally normal development - and a sign of a quick mind, to boot. So there (ha!).

But I'm with you on the mild anxiety - Mike's father and brother are dyslexic and although it's common for children to mirror-spell (reverse) words for awhile at a certain age, I never quite breathed evenly until our kidlets stopped doing it.