Tactful silence

Is my tongue still bleeding?  Because I had to bite it so hard when my wife and her girlfriend were chatting in our living room on the weekend.

"Here, 'Chelle, you can have this sweater if you want.  It was almost a hundred bucks and I've worn it, like, maybe three times in the last year."

[AMY tries on white, hand-knit sweater for display]

"See?  It's nice, but can you see me wearing this in a house with two baby boys any time soon?  Not likely.  I'd never get the puke and spaghetti stains out of it."

"No, probably not, eh?  Too bad though, because your boobs look pretty good in it."

"Um, excuse me, my boobs aren't accessories."

"Amy?  Yes, your boobs ARE accessories."

[Simon bites tongue.]

Comments

[Mark]

You dodged a bullet there (one shooting from your wife's fembot boob, of course).

[Linda]

I feel compelled to share a bit of female accessorizing information, not that it's terribly relevant but the visual is worth the sharing...
A rule of thumb when putting said accessorization into practice, the "trick" to not overdoing is to stand in front of a full-length mirror, spin around and stop, facing the mirror. Take in the full view. The first thing (accessory)you see, remove.
For me, it's usually a scarf or earrings that are too big. I'm guessing, though, in Amy's case...

[Paula]

Not the Niagara-on-the-Lake sweater?? I'm guessing she's not as sentimental about that day as you are ;)

[Cheeseburger Brown]

Dear Linda,

What if the first thing I notice is my nose?

Love,
Cheeseburger Brown

[Linda]

Dear CBB,

You may be looking a bit high, I dunno. I think maybe the rule only applies to the crap you pile on after the basic clothing, unless of course you're wearing one of those cool glasses/nose/moustache deals. In that case, I'm guessing it would be in your best fashion interest to remove that particular accessory...

Love,
Linda

ps Simon... is this one of your smartass friends???