My surreal life

Have you looked over at the foetal countdown timer there at the top of the right hand sidebar lately?

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18 days as of this writing.  March 4th is the due date.

Our house has arrived at a relative state of equilibrium wherein we will welcome the new life, thereby offsetting said equilibrium until a new one is established.  Life is cyclical in nature, so I'm down with this.  I'm cool with it.  Adjustments will be made.

Now that Amy's in her last month, the doctor's visits are every week until The Main Event.  Monday's appointment revealed that she's already 1 cm dilated.  Just nine more to go.  Can you all join me in a big ol'...

...Gooooo-OOOOOOO Cervix!!

A couple brief observations before I have lunch:

I am the last remaining biped in the house, of the five life forms not currently confined by a placenta.  The dogs go without saying.  Dex has taken to gallumphing around the living room and kitchen on all fours either in hot pursuit of the canines or in the hopes that they will chase him.  The accompanying high-pitched squealing giggle fits are quite endearing.  He has also, somewhat alarmingly, taken to driving his forehead into the carpet, raising his arse high into the air and then walking forward until he hits something or can't stand the rug burn any more.

He, uh, must get that from his mother's side.

Amy no longer counts as bipedal either.  She is prone much more often than upright, and when not lying down can be found crouched on all fours in the middle of the living room, surveying her domestic demesne like a staid silver-back gorilla does his corner of the jungle.  Amy just doesn't have the knuckles for the full effect.  And really, she's ostensibly so positioned to relieve what stress she can from her back and ribcage.  The latter of which feels like bustin' open more often than not.

Though I'm the last still to remain true to my Homo Erectus ancestors (more the erectus than the homo, but, you know...), my mind has started to slip.

First thing this morning I helped give a presentation to our executive here at work.  During my 15 minutes I realised that I was up there dressed in a tan polo shirt, white under shirt, tan corduroys, black shoes and a black leather belt.  I also noted that the lights were dimmed in order to better see the laptop projector.  This confluence of realisations quickly led me to the conclusion that if somebody was sitting at the back of the room and had really bad eyesight, they might mistake me for being naked, clad only in a black belt and shoes.

Which would, of course, be patently untrue.  We're half a week away yet from casual Friday.

Before I totally lost it up there, I decided instead to think of myself as the Naked Meeting Ninja, clad only in my Black Belt of Presentation Prowess and Black Patent Leather Shoes of Punctuality.

I got compliments afterwards on the succinctness of my presentation.

Naked Meeting Ninja strikes again!!!

Comments

[Dixie]

I hope everything goes really well for you guys with the birth and the first couple of weeks (months!!) adjustment. If you have any questions about coping with 2 kids schedules, etc. just email. Looking forward to finding out who's in there!!!

[LInda]

LOL. Glad you weren't wearing a hat... Or, God forbid, a cape.
I'm getting so excited for this baby. You know he/she will be a Pisces, like me. Uh oh. Ah, that's cool. A little neurosis never hurt anybody ;-)
Prayers for Amy for a quick one. Delivery, that is.

[Mark]

Glad you made it through the presentation, and that the wife is apparently going to make it through the pregnancy.

Best line: "surveying her domestic demesne like a staid silver-back gorilla does his corner of the jungle"

Your mind might be going, but you still got it.

(I finally posted at about 8 a.m. CT this morning. Valentine's Day festivities had my otherwise pre-occupied last night)

[Jenn]

You keep an eye on that boy...I have a story.

When my brother was about 7, he would come home from school and complain about horrible headaches. My Mum was getting very concerned and booked an appointment with the doctor. Then one day she was taking the bus somewhere, just as my brother was walking home from school. Now, keep in mind, this was Regina, Saskatchewan in December. My brother had got it into his mind that he could tunnel through the snow. All my mother saw was her son, with his toque pulled down over his face, on his hands and knees plowing head first through the deep snow.

Sounds like Declan is well on his way to being an expert snow tunneler too...