Simon: Hey God? You there?
God: Always. And all ways.
Simon: Hey I like that!
God: I figure it's best to start off with a little esoterica right away just to establish the proper stream of consciousness for conversations like this. 'sup?
Simon: My wife's pregnant again.
God: Like I don't know that.
Simon: Well, I'm a little nervous about the whole thing.
God: What about specifically?
Simon: Don't you know?
God: Of course I know! I know everything. If I were to trim the merest sliver of a toenail and imbue you with that fraction of my knowledge, it would still be more than enough to cause your head to implode in a couple of femtoseconds.
Simon: So then why don't you tell me what I'm nervous about?
God: Because you already know and having me tell you won't help even a little bit. All you need is an open ear and the willingness to speak from the heart. All good things flow from that. Neither will the fact that your words are cast into the world be of aid to you. It is the act of that sharing that is the balm you seek. The unburdening of woe and worry. An open ear can assume more weight than one can imagine.
Simon: But what if someday you're not there to lend me that open ear?
God: The grass has ears, my Son. The wind, the woods, the refuse bins. Your family and friends have ears. And they all lead to me. The birds have ears. The walls and your car's dashboard. The leaves on the trees and the book in your hand and...
Simon: And the corn?
God: Shut up! That was gonna be my line!
Simon: Sorry.
God: 'sokay. I've gotten over that whole Sodom and Gomorrah episode. I'm a much nicer God these days. Less retributive. Could say you've caught me on a good day.
Simon: So how many good days do you have left?
God: I'm yankin' ya, Si. Lighten up! They're all good days for me. You don't actually hold truck with all of what you read and hear, do you? Take it as, er, shall we say, "Gospel"?
Simon: Shouldn't I?
God: Look, that's an entirely different conversation, short answer being, "No". Let's get back to this whole business of you knocking your wife up and being nervous about the consequences of your direct and intentional actions.
Simon: Well, when you put it that way...
God: "When you put it that way," what? You already have one kid, Me bless his little heart, and I know you're astute enough to figure out what you'll need to do before the next one comes along.
Simon: Well gee, thanks for the vote of confidence. That helps a little.
God: Sometimes that's all a fella needs to realise that he's got what it takes to get things done. The confidence always comes from within you, you sometimes just hafta be reminded that it's there in the first place. Sometimes it takes a reminder from God to spur you on. I'm good that way.
Simon: But what about the added financial stresses of another child to feed and clothe? My raise this year wasn't what I was expecting. And what about devoting the time to raising another child? Between my wife and son and dogs, I feel like I barely have enough time to eke out a little for myself every now and again! What about planning for university for another baby? What about making sure I don't favour one more than the other? What about the...
God: You say "what about" one more time, the cattle ranchers in southern Alberta will have your ass for a salt lick, mark me.
Simon: Well, do you have any answers for me?
God: No.
Simon: No?! Just no?
God: Yes.
Simon: That doesn't seem very fair!
God: Fair? Never said life was fair. Where's the fun in life if I give you all the answers? Making it up as you go along is what makes this LIFE! Living Is For Experience: that's life. (Oh Christ, I better write that one down...) It's the experience that matters, not the end result. (Which, by the way, is the same for everybody.) It'd be like cheating over your buddy's shoulder all through the school year. Come time for the final exam, under the eagle eyes of the teachers, you're screwed.
Simon: Ouch. That's harsh.
God: No, that's Truth.
Simon: So, you're saying that I should have the confidence in my own abilities to be able to do the best by my family given the means I have available to me?
God: Close. I'm saying you DO have the confidence to blah, blah, blah, whatever you just said. Let. It. Out. Revel in your unique talents. Exalt in the wonderfulness that is you. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. Praise Me for imbuing in you all that you need to succeed before you even knew you needed it. (Just don't build any golden statues; I might start to regress and get a little smitey.) And when you've slowed down some with the navel gazing and the hallelujahs - don't take too long - take stock and apply yourself. There is nothing you can't do. No thing unachievable. An inspired man applied is well nigh unstoppable.
Simon: Sounds like I'm getting a pep talk from The Almighty!
God: I can break out the pom-poms and the unitard if they'll help.
Simon: Err, no, thanks. Just the thought of... never mind. This whole chat we've been having here has really helped to put some things in perspective. I like your point of view.
God: Of course you do. It's just like what Obi-Wan said to Luke in Return of the Jedi. "Many of the Truths we cling to depend greatly on our point of view." I inspired George to write that.
Simon: No shit?
God: No shit. It's too bad the Bearded Phenom didn't think to consult with Yours Truly on that latest trilogy. The lightsabres were pretty cool, but could you believe some of what passed for dialogue? Getting a little big for his britches if you ask me.
Simon: But, umm, that too is an entirely different conversation, right?
God: You have the Truth of it there. So. You good?
Simon: Yeah, God. I'm good. Thanks.
God: No problem-o. Any time. Just speak from the heart and listen with ears wide open and I'm there, like, poof!
Simon: You have no idea how comforting that is to hear.
God: Actually, I do. But I know what you mean. Good luck with that whole family way you've gotten yourself in. There's nothing better for you right now, hard as it may seem at times. Take care of your Self.
Simon: Hey God? One last thing?
God: Yeah?
Simon: I love you.
God: I love you too, my Son.
Simon, I love this....although I had a near aneurism trying to picture the I AM in a unitard and pom-poms....although if I am created in His Image, that makes him me and vice-versa....what I'm trying to say ( badly) is that this was and is thought-provoking....Penny
Posted by: Penny | Monday, 22 August 2005 at 08:41 AM
Wow, never read this until now (1/06). I will have to revisit from time to time and read it again, it's that good.
Posted by: Linda | Sunday, 15 January 2006 at 02:46 PM